Friday, September 10, 2010

Monkey Shorts

ok, so the other day i went with my sister-in-law to "town" & my kid was totally inexplicably insane!! we started our lil trip with a visit to clothing store #1 where she decided it would be fun to touch the clothes with the bottoms of her filthy shoes. yup, you read that right, the bottoms of her filthy, nasty, disgusting shoes!! i was holding her so she could not run around the store like some little heathen child, BUT, she decides to hold her legs straight out so that her feet touch the clothes. before we leave she has managed to get down & rummage the racks of clothes, touch EVERY pair of shoes in the building, & try on ALL the jewelry. so we are off to lunch where she is fairly calm, wiggly but calm. 
clothing store #2 brings waves of newly found energy to my tiny monster! she is grabbing wallets off shelves, sampling the perfumes, spinning the jewelry racks, & sprinting in the skirt section. by this time i have lost all composure & am about to snap.  she is like the energizer bunny, she keeps going & going & going. i can't take it any more so i shamefully haul the tiny tyrant outside to wait for her aunt to finish shopping.
our last stop is a shoe store. GREAT!! my child loves shoes. i mean, LOVES shoes with a fiery burning passion. big shoes, little shoes, ugly shoes it doesn't matter as long as she can get them on her feet. we get in the poor unwitting shoe store & i find a bench to sit her on & tell her not to move. yeah so much for that wasted breath. i am helping my sister-in-law find a  pair of shoes & i look back at my kiddo & she is up trying on shoes, sitting there in the isle on the floor with about 3 pairs of shoes. i tell her no & put her back on her seat. this happens about 4 million times before we leave the store & i have single handedly restocked nearly the entire children's section. FINALLY its time to go. i have never been so ready to get out of a shoe store in my entire life. i was so ready to just get back home so she could be free to reign down her special brand of horror in a less public setting. by the time we ogt home all i wanted to do was take
a nap. i was frustrated & worn out like a pair of smelly gym
shoes. i opened thefront door of my lovely, wonderful, familiar
house & remembered....i still had to clean house before the hubby got home!

1 comment:

  1. BAHAHAHAHAHAHA you had me cracking up! i heart you so bad! poor twylia. it always makes me feel better when i hear that other mommies lose their shmidt with their kids...then i don't feel quite so crazy/bipolar/evil when i do it with mine.